For years, I had a cell phone. A regular, no frills, basic cell phone. Life was simpler then. You dialed, pushed send and voila!, your party was on the other end.
Then, Tim decided that I needed to upgrade. It wasn't enough that he could call me whenever he wanted; he desperately needed to send me e-mails as well. (These were the days when he personally carried two phones and one blackberry. When one of them rang, it was like watching outtakes from "So You Think You Can Dance" as he groped, slapped, patted and dug into every pocket and belt case on his person before finding the right one.)
And so, I got my blackberry. And within a few months, I had issues. And a few months later, it died.
So I had it replaced (oh, yeah, and lost all my info as a result--minor detail).
When I took it in, they explained that my "plan" was not up for renewal, so I couldn't get an "upgrade". Well, that was fine by me, since I didn't use most of the features on the darn thing anyway. Seriously, do I really need three email inboxes? And what the heck is the difference between "tasks" and "memo pad"? They are both blank pages where you make lists. Would it be the end of civilization as we know it if I titled one of the lists under "memo pad" "tasks"?
And why do I need a map of the world which is so small I would need the Hubble Telescope to read it, and as far as I can tell, they don't name all the countries anyway, so what good is it? But I digress...
Back to the "plan". They were all concerned about the fact that I couldn't get an "upgrade" until my "plan" was up, but they could give me a new blackberry...for $50.
Okay. Once again, fine by me. I'll take the new blackberry. Do I get to choose one from the display?
Well, no, because I have a "plan", "new" doesn't really mean "new", it just means new to me. Just like my old blackberry will be "new" to somebody else who has a "plan" after they slap a fresh coat of paint on it and roll back the odometer.
Since I apparently didn't have a choice without spending $300, I agreed to stay with the "plan" and just get a "new" blackberry...which died this past weekend.
Once again, I had to go back to the store to see if I was still operating under the "plan" or not.
Now, since this is a place where they are selling technology, they have to make it as technologically challenging a place as possible to the customer. First, you have to sign in on a computer screen giving your name, phone number, zip code (why? Would they actually say, "Oh, sorry. You're 20002 and we only cover people who live in 20001?"), and other assorted info such as hat size and date of last dental exam.
Then, you wait for your name to be displayed on a giant screen where you join one of three queues (didn't we win the war against the British so we wouldn't have to use words like this anymore?) depending on what you needed. When your name moves to the top, you get called over to the corresponding desk.
After a twenty minute wait, Iwas called to the tech support desk by a guy who divided his time between checking his own voicemails and reiterating that I was still bound by my "plan" to get a "new" blackberry and not an "upgrade" if my blackberry was indeed broken (did he think I was making it up? that I got my jollies driving miles out of my way to a store to stand in line just for fun?).
Uh uh. Fool me once...
I refused to be bound by the "plan" anymore. I wanted a new blackberry. New meaning brand spanking, direct from China, out-of-the-box new.
Well, okay, but I would need to sign up for a different queue...sales.
Twenty minutes later, I was again confronted by a young man who kept harping on and on about my "plan" which apparently had been chiseled into concrete and signed with blood. As far as I could tell, the D-day plans for the invasion of Normandy were, by comparison, only a group of fairly loose "suggestions".
When was this plan up, I asked. February 3, so if I could just wait a few weeks...
Two weeks without a phone? Sure. Just give me yours to use in the meantime. No? Then how about we get me a "new", "upgraded" phone now!
Obviously wishing to preserve his health and well-being, the guy backed down. Keeping one eye warily on me, he punched a few buttons on his computer and offered me the only upgraded phone available since I needed it to work globally.
And it was...drum roll please...the exact same make and model as the one I had and it would cost me...another drum roll...$109 with a $50 rebate!
Excuse me? $9? $9?! All this fuss and bother about an "upgrade" amounted to $9 and some packing materials? Are you kidding me?
Wisely, he completed the sale without saying the words "upgrade", "new" or "plan" again.
And so I left with my new, upgraded $9 phone. As I ran a few errands, I luxuriated in being able to do e-mails and talk on the phone again.
Until, that is, I discovered that one of the keys is not working properly and was getting worse as I went along...and I had just signed up for another "plan".
Showing posts with label blackberry. Show all posts
Showing posts with label blackberry. Show all posts
Friday, January 23, 2009
Monday, October 6, 2008
Out Of Touch
Within the last two weeks, I have had issues with pretty much every single communications device I own.
First, it was my blackberry. I never saw it coming. We had just celebrated our first anniversary in June, and I thought everything was fine.
Oh, sure, we'd been having some problems lately. The battery wasn't holding a charge quite like it should, the wheel was a little slow to respond at times, and, okay, so maybe I wasn't getting my messages in a timely fashion any more. But, hey, nobody's perfect.
I tried to overlook these things. After all, we'd been around the world together and had shared so many memories. Our first trip to London and the search for a phone store after the sales woman had put the SYM card in backwards. Our trip to China where it did double duty as both my alarm clock and my only link to Tim who was in India. Our many, many hours of playing BrickBreaker while Tim was busy talking to everyone in the world besides me while we were at dinner/the beach/the pool, in a car/plane/boat. Ahhh. Good times.
But alas, all good things must come to an end, and ours finally came two weeks ago when I dropped my beloved blackberry and watched in horror as the rollarball bounced across the floor after the wheel cracked in two.
Numbly, I gathered up the pieces with trembling fingers while I tried to stifle the wail of despair that had gathered in my throat. Devastated at the thought of losing my dear companion, I sought immediate medical attention with someone who has been through more blackberries in a year than pairs of socks in a lifetime...Tim.
With bated breath, I watched as he managed to snap the pieces back on, but I knew it was only a temporary reprieve. A week later, I had to bow to the inevitable and replace my blackberry...which was easier said than done.
The first three stores did not carry the same model, and, since I have a contract, they could only replace my model with the exact same one...unless I wanted to pay $300. Uh, gee, no thanks.
The fourth store didn't have my model either, but if I waited two months, I could get the newest model which they heard was gonna be real cool. Just like the iphone, only better because it was made by them. Oh, sure, wait two months? No problem. Just give me your phone in the meantime. No? You don't want to be without a phone for two months? Wow. Imagine that!
Finally, I drove downtown (which I really, really, really hate to do) and got a replacement. Without any of my information able to be transferred. Without the ability to send text messages. Which I did not discover until I left the store and was on my way to Pennsylvania.
And so, the following week, I had to go back downtown (did I mention that I really, really, really hate to go there?) and have them fix my new blackberry, which also has a slow wheel and can't hold a decent charge. We were not off to a good start.
While this was going on, I was also having my little "issue" with Verizon (and no, we still don't have service).
And, as if all this wasn't bad enough, my computer is also in critical condition. Even my sister couldn't patch it up, although she spent most of one weekend trying.
The screen has a blue/green line running down the center, the CD drive won't work anymore, every time I use it, I get an error message and, even though I've clicked "report error" until my finger is ready to fall off, microsoft doesn't really care ( I actually think this is just a placebo message, and the only place a message is sent is to the recycle bin). Oh, and it is slower than dial-up. As a matter of fact, I believe pony express would be a faster way to deliver and receive information.
I don't want to do it, especially not so soon after losing my blackberry, but I know I'm going to have to put it out of it's misery. After all, it is over five years old, which is like one thousand in computer years. It has been my good and faithful companion as I learned to surf the net, do a power point presentation and download music for my itunes library. It is keeper of all my information...names, addresses, phone numbers, pictures, videos and documents.
Two dear friends in as many weeks. I may never recover. (Sob!)
And did I mention, I still don't have service for our house phone?
First, it was my blackberry. I never saw it coming. We had just celebrated our first anniversary in June, and I thought everything was fine.
Oh, sure, we'd been having some problems lately. The battery wasn't holding a charge quite like it should, the wheel was a little slow to respond at times, and, okay, so maybe I wasn't getting my messages in a timely fashion any more. But, hey, nobody's perfect.
I tried to overlook these things. After all, we'd been around the world together and had shared so many memories. Our first trip to London and the search for a phone store after the sales woman had put the SYM card in backwards. Our trip to China where it did double duty as both my alarm clock and my only link to Tim who was in India. Our many, many hours of playing BrickBreaker while Tim was busy talking to everyone in the world besides me while we were at dinner/the beach/the pool, in a car/plane/boat. Ahhh. Good times.
But alas, all good things must come to an end, and ours finally came two weeks ago when I dropped my beloved blackberry and watched in horror as the rollarball bounced across the floor after the wheel cracked in two.
Numbly, I gathered up the pieces with trembling fingers while I tried to stifle the wail of despair that had gathered in my throat. Devastated at the thought of losing my dear companion, I sought immediate medical attention with someone who has been through more blackberries in a year than pairs of socks in a lifetime...Tim.
With bated breath, I watched as he managed to snap the pieces back on, but I knew it was only a temporary reprieve. A week later, I had to bow to the inevitable and replace my blackberry...which was easier said than done.
The first three stores did not carry the same model, and, since I have a contract, they could only replace my model with the exact same one...unless I wanted to pay $300. Uh, gee, no thanks.
The fourth store didn't have my model either, but if I waited two months, I could get the newest model which they heard was gonna be real cool. Just like the iphone, only better because it was made by them. Oh, sure, wait two months? No problem. Just give me your phone in the meantime. No? You don't want to be without a phone for two months? Wow. Imagine that!
Finally, I drove downtown (which I really, really, really hate to do) and got a replacement. Without any of my information able to be transferred. Without the ability to send text messages. Which I did not discover until I left the store and was on my way to Pennsylvania.
And so, the following week, I had to go back downtown (did I mention that I really, really, really hate to go there?) and have them fix my new blackberry, which also has a slow wheel and can't hold a decent charge. We were not off to a good start.
While this was going on, I was also having my little "issue" with Verizon (and no, we still don't have service).
And, as if all this wasn't bad enough, my computer is also in critical condition. Even my sister couldn't patch it up, although she spent most of one weekend trying.
The screen has a blue/green line running down the center, the CD drive won't work anymore, every time I use it, I get an error message and, even though I've clicked "report error" until my finger is ready to fall off, microsoft doesn't really care ( I actually think this is just a placebo message, and the only place a message is sent is to the recycle bin). Oh, and it is slower than dial-up. As a matter of fact, I believe pony express would be a faster way to deliver and receive information.
I don't want to do it, especially not so soon after losing my blackberry, but I know I'm going to have to put it out of it's misery. After all, it is over five years old, which is like one thousand in computer years. It has been my good and faithful companion as I learned to surf the net, do a power point presentation and download music for my itunes library. It is keeper of all my information...names, addresses, phone numbers, pictures, videos and documents.
Two dear friends in as many weeks. I may never recover. (Sob!)
And did I mention, I still don't have service for our house phone?
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
The Five Stages of Grief
Several thousand years ago, a Greek guy traveled many miles with an important message, then dropped dead. This event gave birth to the word marathon.
Last week, my blackberry traveled many miles to Puerto Rico filled with several important messages, then dropped dead. This event gave birth to a lot of words, most of them having four letters.
At first, I was in denial. I turned it off, then on again. I took out the battery and blew off the imaginary dust. I plucked out the SYM card and blew on that too just for good measure. I gave it to Tim who did all of these things over again.
I moved on to anger. I shook it, hit it and seriously considered chucking it out the window of the car onto the freeway.
From there, I segued into the third stage -- bargaining. I begged, I pleaded, I cajoled. I tried to do a nine day novena in nine minutes. Nada. My blackberry was D.O.A.
Panic began to set in. What if my friends or family needed to reach me that week? What if the alarm went off at the house and the alarm co. needed to get ahold of me (this has happened more than once)? More importantly, what if Pottery Barn was having a big sale or Overstock.com was having a free shipping weekend? Arrrrgh!!!
Tim tried to calm me down, assuring me that we could find a Verizon store somewhere on the island and get help (or maybe he said psychiatric hospital, I wasn't really paying attention to him at this point).
Upon arriving at the hotel, he headed for the registration desk and I beelined it for the concierge, pretty much plowing over anyone too slow to get out of my way.
"Is there a Verizon store nearby?" I gasped out.
The girl gave me a sympathetic smile. "Sorry, no."
I breathed deep and tried again. "Is there one anywhere ?"
"Not on Puerto Rico." She took a slight step backward. Smart girl.
"You have no Verizon store, cart, stand, anything, anywhere or the entire island?" I wanted to make sure I nailed it down to the letter before I took the final plunge off the deep end.
"No. We only have one company that was part of Verizon, but they don't offer Verizon service or help their customers."
Gee, another dysfunctional communications company. What are the odds???
"Is there anywhere you can recommend that I go for help with my blackberry?" I persisted.
"Sorry." No, she wasn't. She was still able to get her e-mails, phone calls and text messages. I, on the other hand, wouldn't be receiving any good luck because I couldn't forward the dancing leprechaun on to eighty-six of my closest friends in the next ten minutes.
Stage four, depression, kicked in and we weren't even checked in yet.
And to make matters worse, Tim had decided to travel light and only brought his blackberry with him. No second or third phone, no laptop. No contact at all with the outside world except for his blackberry. What had he been thinking!!!
One blackberry for the two of us? Right. Like I was ever going to get a crack at it. He would rather give me some other less vital part of him like a kidney or maybe half his brain.
And so, acceptance gradually set in. I visited the business center almost daily, but it wasn't the same. I had to fight for my thirty minutes of computer time with the rest of the other poor blackberryless fools. I would have been better off sticking a message in a bottle and waiting for low tide some days, and I don't even want to address the phone issue.
Tim, meanwhile, chatted away at the pool, the beach, the restaurant. He e-mailed and opened attachments with no time constraints or someone trying to look over his shoulder. He even googled a few times. He took his blackberry everywhere with him (yes, even the bathroom). So much for sharing.
Even now that we are back home and my blackberry is somewhat up and running (Puerto Rico is definitely off our list of vacation spots), I am still not through with the stages of grief. I think I may have found a sixth and seventh that were not on the original list. And every time my blackberry beeps and I get a voice message that was left last Tuesday or Wednesday, I go right back to the beginning and have to start all over again.
Last week, my blackberry traveled many miles to Puerto Rico filled with several important messages, then dropped dead. This event gave birth to a lot of words, most of them having four letters.
At first, I was in denial. I turned it off, then on again. I took out the battery and blew off the imaginary dust. I plucked out the SYM card and blew on that too just for good measure. I gave it to Tim who did all of these things over again.
I moved on to anger. I shook it, hit it and seriously considered chucking it out the window of the car onto the freeway.
From there, I segued into the third stage -- bargaining. I begged, I pleaded, I cajoled. I tried to do a nine day novena in nine minutes. Nada. My blackberry was D.O.A.
Panic began to set in. What if my friends or family needed to reach me that week? What if the alarm went off at the house and the alarm co. needed to get ahold of me (this has happened more than once)? More importantly, what if Pottery Barn was having a big sale or Overstock.com was having a free shipping weekend? Arrrrgh!!!
Tim tried to calm me down, assuring me that we could find a Verizon store somewhere on the island and get help (or maybe he said psychiatric hospital, I wasn't really paying attention to him at this point).
Upon arriving at the hotel, he headed for the registration desk and I beelined it for the concierge, pretty much plowing over anyone too slow to get out of my way.
"Is there a Verizon store nearby?" I gasped out.
The girl gave me a sympathetic smile. "Sorry, no."
I breathed deep and tried again. "Is there one anywhere ?"
"Not on Puerto Rico." She took a slight step backward. Smart girl.
"You have no Verizon store, cart, stand, anything, anywhere or the entire island?" I wanted to make sure I nailed it down to the letter before I took the final plunge off the deep end.
"No. We only have one company that was part of Verizon, but they don't offer Verizon service or help their customers."
Gee, another dysfunctional communications company. What are the odds???
"Is there anywhere you can recommend that I go for help with my blackberry?" I persisted.
"Sorry." No, she wasn't. She was still able to get her e-mails, phone calls and text messages. I, on the other hand, wouldn't be receiving any good luck because I couldn't forward the dancing leprechaun on to eighty-six of my closest friends in the next ten minutes.
Stage four, depression, kicked in and we weren't even checked in yet.
And to make matters worse, Tim had decided to travel light and only brought his blackberry with him. No second or third phone, no laptop. No contact at all with the outside world except for his blackberry. What had he been thinking!!!
One blackberry for the two of us? Right. Like I was ever going to get a crack at it. He would rather give me some other less vital part of him like a kidney or maybe half his brain.
And so, acceptance gradually set in. I visited the business center almost daily, but it wasn't the same. I had to fight for my thirty minutes of computer time with the rest of the other poor blackberryless fools. I would have been better off sticking a message in a bottle and waiting for low tide some days, and I don't even want to address the phone issue.
Tim, meanwhile, chatted away at the pool, the beach, the restaurant. He e-mailed and opened attachments with no time constraints or someone trying to look over his shoulder. He even googled a few times. He took his blackberry everywhere with him (yes, even the bathroom). So much for sharing.
Even now that we are back home and my blackberry is somewhat up and running (Puerto Rico is definitely off our list of vacation spots), I am still not through with the stages of grief. I think I may have found a sixth and seventh that were not on the original list. And every time my blackberry beeps and I get a voice message that was left last Tuesday or Wednesday, I go right back to the beginning and have to start all over again.
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