I have finally found someone worse than all those repair people who give you that infamous "window" as though you have nothing better to do than be at their beck and call. Service people who won't even give you a day much less a window as though you have nothing to do at all.
Last spring, after a lot of storms and high winds, we needed to have some trees removed. After doing some research, I contacted a company that had good ratings, and asked them for an estimate. They told me they would look at the schedule and get back to me with a time and day shortly.
Now to me, shortly means later that day, maybe the next day. To them, it meant anywhere from that moment until the end of time. So, two days later, I checked in and asked if they were still interested in giving an estimate.
Huh? Estimate? Oh. Yeah. Um. How about next Monday?
Okay. Can you give me a time frame?
Uh. Hmmm. Time frame?
Yeah. You know. Time frame. A span of time anywhere from four to sixteen hours when I will sit home twiddling my thumbs and then you show up at the last possible second if you bother to come at all.
We'll have to get back to you on that later.
Later? Let's see. To you, shortly means what, a year or two, so later must mean...I give up. The twelfth of never?
Two days later...still no time frame. So I contacted them again explaining that while, in their own, twisted little universe they were more important than air, the rest of us peasants actually had something called a life. At least the phone/cable/heating/appliance repair people had the decency to pretend that they cared about me by going through the motions of scheduling a window, but these tree people couldn't even be bothered to do that much. I mean, it's not like I expected them to actually stick to what they told me. So, how about it? Morning, afternoon, evening? Pick one.
Oh. I wanted a time frame on Monday?
Okay. Do me a favor. Get a co-worker to stick a mirror under your nose to see if you are still breathing because I suspect you may be brain dead.
But Monday was a whole two days away. Did I really need a time frame now?
No. Why don't you wait until Sunday night at 11:59 to give me a time frame, because I would really enjoy trying to arrange my schedule at the last second. Challenges like that are what makes life worth living, don't you think?
Needless to say, I went with another company.
I would like to think that this was an anomaly, but the other day, I ran into the same thing all over again. This time, it was a guy from the gas company.
We decided this summer, after losing our power for the the kajillionth time, to get a generator. Because Tim has to have one that could power a small village, the Empire State Building and The Mall of America all at the same time, we needed a new gas meter.
Okay, when can you do it?
How about Wednesday?
Fine. When on Wednesday?
I'll have to call you back.
Seriously? C'mon. It's Monday. How hard is it to schedule something less than two days away? I'm not asking for a lifetime commitment, just a vague idea of when you think you might feel like dropping by.
I'm not sure of my schedule. I'll have to let you know tomorrow.
Super. Don't worry about me. I only have places to go and things to do, but hey, I wouldn't want to make you commit to something before you're sure.
The next day, he called back with a two hour window for the following day.
Yippee!! A two hour window. Unheard of. He was my new hero...until he didn't show up.
After two and a half hours, I called and asked how late was he running?
Oh. It's not me. It's, um, let's see, who is it?
Gee, I'm on the edge of my seat. Who is it?
It's Mike. Yeah. He got held up waiting for a part on a job. I don't think he's going to get there today. Wait. Who'd you say you were again? Morgan?
Bit your tongue. Bite your tongue. There is only one gas company, and you need this, I told myself even as I pictured eviscerating him, or at the very least slapping him silly.
No. Sinclair.
Sinclair. You're not on the schedule today. No. I have you for tomorrow. Did I tell you today?
It's enough to make you long for the good old sixteen hour window.
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